Disclaimer: Paramount owns almost all character written about in this story. I am just taking them for an a little while.

Feedback is welcomed at succubus@get2net.dk

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I watched him from the first day in the Maquis. Seska made arrangements for him to be on my ship. Her exact words, if I remember them correctly were: "He might come in handy one day." I was such a fool to let him fly that ship where he got caught in, things might have developed differently, but at the time it still felt as if he betrayed us.... me. It is only now that I understand the truth and know the truth.

Now as I lie here and watch him sleep, I regret all those years I spent fearing him and pretending to hate him, despise him. I feared him for his beauty and the power he had over me. No one except him could unbalance me. I was always the stoic warrior but he saw right through me. I usually lie here curled up behind him after our passionate lovemaking and watch him as he sleeps. I need to know that he is there and is not going away.

Today I almost lost him, again. *There is something about him he never can get on and off an planet without getting into trouble,* I think with a smile Always the trouble finder.

I remember, back in the Maquis I often had to come to his rescue. He would get drunk and provoke some unlucky fellow at some bar. Or his beauty simply just attracted the worst of the worst.

I believed for many years that he betrayed the Maguis and me to Starfleet and then when I saw him on Voyager which was supposed to capture us, it only brought more wood on the already heated fire. But even then I couldn't hate him. I brush away a strand of hair from his eyelids. Harry seemed to be the only one who would stay within 20 feet of Tom without being ordered to do so. I actually felt jealous of their friendship. I wanted him to trust me.

For a short time I thought that they were lovers, but after Akritiria I learned that I was wrong.

So as the heartsick man I was, I decide to seduce Thomas Eugene Paris. Subtle little comments and touches. Seeking him out on the holodeck for a game of pool. It all went well, we became good friends and as an extra accomplishment I also got to know Harry better and I knew that no matter what he would always be there for Tom or so I thought. Four years into our journey he died under an attack and he died saving Tom's life. It was the most heroic thing I ever saw anyone do or maybe I'm only saying that because it was the person I loved he died for. After that I went after Tom with everything I had. No more time to loose.

I asked him on a date and he said yes. He blushed when I told him to take light clothing on, he understood the comment alright. He came to my quarters at 19.00, dressed in black pants which fit him perfectly, all the curves were beautifully shown. The dark blue silk shirt he had on made him look even more delicious. The food was eaten slowly and quietly and I made sure that he always had enough to drink. After dinner we went to the couch.

At first, we sat next to one and another but then gradually as I started to kiss him, he ended on my lap. He was a little drunk but not enough to not know what was going on as he started roaming those gorgeous hands all over my back. Of course I always wanted to take the lead and so I did. I swooped him up and stood, he clamped his legs around my waist and I could feel his erection and I'm quite sure he could feel mine too.

I brought him to my bed and lowered him onto it. His lips were swollen and red from kissing, his body flushed and the eyes were dazed and full of lust. We made love that night for the first time and after that we started dating, after a while we brought it out in the open.

Of course we had a hard time for a while, some people still didn't like Tom all that much but they soon stopped bothering him when Tom saved Dalby, the scum, on some planet.

And here I am, beside the love of my life. No one is going to take him away from me, no one. Tom stirres. "Chakotay what are you doing," a sleepy voice asks from under the covers. "Just go back to sleep Tom, I just had problems sleeping ok." A slight movement in bed, followed by a husky voice. "Well, if you can't sleep then maybe we can do something else." This was followed with a tongue licking its way across a broad chest.

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Constructive comments will be taken serious. Flames will happily be given to my neighbors goat who just as happily will eat them.

October 1998 Jeanette Kofoed